Now to my vent regarding Monday September 28...Josh and I have officially been married 1 1/2 years. Honestly a day I never saw coming looking back at our 1st year. It has been a rough one. We only dated for a month, but we grew up together so who knew we had so many quirks that we both were so unaware of?!?!? I came into this marriage with 3 children and he had zero, problem #1. In my previous marriage, I did all the discipline, the errands, the sports, the cleaning, the cooking, the loving, etc. Name it and I did it. My ex was not involved unless someone was watching. And then of course when we divorced I did it all on my own fully. Marrying Josh was like hitting a brick wall. I always imagined a husband that helped with everything but did not realize what I was praying I guess. He has one way of raising (iron fist and nothing less) and I have another way (follow the rules but be yourself). Finding that balance is still a work in progress but much much better. Now I also have a husband that is very romantic, nothing I knew about him until we dated. He writes poetry even! He does little surprises here and there. So I tried doing one yesterday for him. I went to far in trying to cover up what I was doing and he snapped! Now we had a fall out this past summer, he moved out even. When he came back we made a vow to never question our love and marriage again. That we would work out all and I do mean ALL problems. So anyone out there have an explaination as to why he was so quick to jump me and question his feelings about me when I snuck away to surprise him and was full out honest about my whereabouts because of it. I admit I was wrong but don't break your vows! I was so frustrated last night! Still am a little bit. I just have a hard time understanding how deep his love goes for me when it can be questioned so quickly?!? I may get mad at him, frustrated and ready to pull my hair out, but I do not question my love for him ever. He is my entire world. He is my best friend. My hope. My love. My past, present and future. He is the man I will sit with at 80 years of age and laugh about memories and cry about memories. I'm hurt and sad and mad all at the same time. Hopefully our week gets better.